I go through these times where it feels like I've lost days or even weeks, like I forget I've talked to people or forget that I've posted here or there, I forget that I've done things or said things.
Then as I come out of the fog I'll wonder why I haven't heard from so and so, or I will look back at posts with no recollection of ever posting them. It is sad and it is scary.
What I do remember feeling is "why cannot I respond?" This one is hard to explain; I will hear/read/see something and my ability to respond goes out the window. I try to think of something, I try to type something, I try to respond and NOTHING. Nothing happens.
This is especially bothersome because it makes me feel like a terrible person, I feel like People will think I am not paying attention. I am. Well, I feel like I am. But I must not be because I cannot even remember the conversation until much later (days or weeks.)
I am missing important conversations, I am not responding appropriately.
I am blessed to have the people in my life who understand, who are patient with me, who love me despite the fact that I can't remember to be responsive as I should be.
I wished, that whatever this is, it would stop happening.